I was recently inspired by a woman who reminded me so much of myself except for the fact that she doesn't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks of her. Yeah....I said it. She has her own business using her own unique gifts and flaunts her quirky personality and sense of humor. I thought to myself, wow that must feel pretty liberating to live like that and terrifying as well because..*gasp* some people might not like me. Then I thought well there are already people already don't like me so what have I got to lose?
I thought back to when I used to be on a dance team and was kicked out of a few numbers since I wasn't "good enough". Regardless dancing is something that has always brought me joy. I thought well why stop doing it just because you haven't won someone else's approval? The same insecurities popped up around my other creative interests such as music, singing etc. The whole comparison devil started to play out in my life until it got to a point of analysis paralysis. We can be afraid of being a beginner and as a female the whole competition game can be fierce. I used to constantly compare myself to other women or my ex's new girlfriend and so on. There is nothing wrong with seeing a positive trait in someone else and trying to emulate it in our own unique way but we often are actually trying to just be a carbon copy of someone else. Now instead of thinking how can I be more like her I think, how can I be more like Jackie? In her fullest potential and expansion and power? So if you want to create an orchestration, a painting, a dance, a novel... Then simply write the first sentence, compose the first note, step the first step. And for me I'll keep dancing!
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